Nation Decides Past Was Complicated, Better to Ignore It
America has officially begun its great historical retreat, a coordinated national effort to stop teaching anything that might make anyone uncomfortable, thoughtful, or informed. The initiative replaces complex historical narratives with vibes-based summaries and the general sense that everything worked out fine, mostly.
“Why learn about difficult topics when we can just pretend they didn’t happen?” suggested one school board member during a heated meeting. “Ignorance is not just blissit’s policy.” The new curriculum focuses exclusively on feel-good moments, like the time America won World War II (without mentioning why it started or what happened to Japanese Americans). Historians from the American Historical Association have updated their mission statement to include “crying softly in archives.”
The retreat strategy involves several key components: eliminating context, avoiding uncomfortable questions, and replacing detailed historical analysis with patriotic photo montages set to inspiring music. Students will learn that all problems were solved in the past through compromise and nobody was ever really that upset about anything.
Controversial topics have been streamlined for maximum vagueness. Slavery becomes “agricultural labor disagreement,” the civil rights movement transforms into “people decided to be nicer,” and the entire Vietnam War is now a footnote reading “there was some confusion in Asia.” According to educational policy analysts at Education Week, this approach ensures students emerge with pride in their heritage and absolutely no understanding of it.
Critics argue that sanitizing history prevents students from understanding how present problems developed and how societies actually create change. Supporters counter that understanding things is overrated and possibly elitist. The curriculum has been endorsed by politicians who benefit from historically illiterate voters and denounced by literally every professional historian. Testing experts from the National Assessment Governing Board report that students can now name all Marvel superheroes but struggle to identify the three branches of government, which seems like a reasonable trade-off in a functioning democracy. Publications like The Atlantic have begun running weekly obituaries for informed citizenship.
SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/the-great-american-history-retreat/
SOURCE: Bohiney.com (https://bohiney.com/the-great-american-history-retreat/)
