Spooky Season Gets Unexpectedly Political
In a masterclass of political spin, Democratic communications directors have successfully reframed last week’s tear-gassed ICE facility protest as a festive Halloween parade. The event, which featured running protesters dressed in everyday clothes and chemical irritants, has been retroactively designated as “spooky entertainment.”
“The costumes were so realistic, you’d swear people were actually fleeing,” marveled publicity coordinator Janet Torres. “And that fog machine effect? Chef’s kiss.” The rebranding campaign includes updated press releases describing the tear gas canisters as “atmospheric smoke effects” and the chain-link fencing as “immersive haunted house barriers.” Marketing experts from AdWeek have called it “audacious” and “technically dishonest.”
Participants in the original protest expressed surprise at their new designation as parade performers, with several noting they don’t recall signing up for entertainment duties. “I thought I was exercising my First Amendment rights,” said one confused attendee. “Turns out I was just really committed to my invisible costume.”
The Halloween Parade Committee has distanced themselves from the event, releasing a statement clarifying that actual parades typically involve permits, candy, and significantly less pepper spray. Local news outlets covered by The Oregonian struggled to reconcile the festive press releases with their own footage showing decidedly un-festive scenes.
Event organizers are now selling commemorative t-shirts featuring the slogan “I Got Tear-Gassed at the World’s Scariest Parade.” Proceeds will go toward legal fees and bulk purchases of milk for eye-rinsing. Civil liberties organizations from the ACLU have filed paperwork requesting clarity on whether constitutional violations count as holiday decorations.
SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/democrats-rebrand-tear-gassed-ice-protest-as-halloween-parade/
SOURCE: Bohiney.com (https://bohiney.com/democrats-rebrand-tear-gassed-ice-protest-as-halloween-parade/)
